I've been gone for a minute!

Hello all! I know I have not blogged here in a minute. Still pregnant, tomorrow I make exactly 31 weeks pregnant, next week I will be 8 months. Gosh how time goes by so fast. It's crazy. But the last trimester seems to take the longest. I want time to speed up and I want my daughter here already. Some updates : 1. I resigned from my job which was heartbreaking for me. I was at that job for 5 years so I miss my co-fam dearly. And not being able to work is driving me insane. I get so bored. 2. I moved out to Long Island with my boyfriend where I have been living for the past 3 weeks. It's a big adjustment for me, very quiet and again, I get bored fast and easy. Plus having no internet access drives me insane. 3. Everything is almost complete for my babyshower which is Feb. 18th. I will have alot of pictures for that. 4. Nesting syndrome has now hit and I am just going bonkers with my daughters room [which my boyfriend keeps messing up with storing his crap in there]. 

I am truely truely excited for my daughters arrival. I can't wait. I just want March here already. There are some more updates but I will leave that for another blog entry sometime this week. Here are some pictures of my pregnancy now. I feel like a whale but I am happy.

ANOTHER SCENE I WAS IN

20 SOMETHING IN THE CITY

I'm back!

I know that I have been gone for a long time. I have been so busy with life. I am a full time student in school now in hopes to become an Art Therapist. I work with children and I am doing theatre as well. So yes I am a very bust bee. I don't know if it was mentioned before but my 2 year old nephew was just recently diagnosed with Autism. This drove me to pursue my education more. So I am learning all that I can to help my sister cope and deal with her son having Autism. It's not the end of the world, he is not slow. He is just different. My nephew is extremely EXTREMELY smart. He just can't express himself like the other children and doesn't speak much yet. But he is making progress and that is important. I love my nephew to pieces and I am doing this for him and the other special needs children out there who need help.

Risk Taking.

It is important to discover who we are, so that way we can connect with others. It is important to discover who we are, so that we can discover mans finite existence on earth.
Yesterday at THE PLAY TANK, it was all fun. We were given an incentive to aide us in getting our creative juices flowing. Personally I would like to get my creative juices flowing. I feel that life has gotten the best of me and I have become less inspired within these past few years.  I used to write and write till I developed calluses on my fingers [writers mark]. The incentive was to share a creative play moment as a child and right away so many memories came to mind. But the most playful moment I had to have had, where I just allowed my imagination to take over was when I tried to run away. Children are easily gullible and impressionable. Growing up I had a favorite movie with a favorite character. Pippy Long Stockings. She was a nomad, a rebel and I wanted to be her. She was a freckled face red haired girl. And in my mind I became her. I would venture off in my room encountering different obstacles but over-coming it because that is what Pippy Long Stocking did. She managed to get out of sticky situations. She had no parents to answer to.
I remember clearly becoming angry at both of my parents one day. That was nothing new because I was notorious for my temper and fits of rage as a kid. No I was not the only child just very stubborn and had a strong character,  still do till this day. But boy did she inspire me. So I plotted to run away. To make a run for it. Not having a clue of what running away really entailed, I put on my dress just like Pippy Long Stockings and packed my little red suitcase that read “On My Way to Grandma’s House” in Spanish. Did I bother to pack clothes? No! I was like 6 years old all I cared about were my toys and art supplies. So I packed all of that. And I don’t know if you remember the old cartoons when hobo’s would pack their belongs inside of a handkerchief tied to a broom stick at the end, throwing it over their shoulder. I have seen it on Charlie Brown , so I called it THE CHARLIE BROWN stick. I packed all of my “belongings” and wrote a good bye letter, slidding it underneath their bedroom door. It read “Dear Mom and Dad, I hope that you are sad, I ran away because I was very bad. I know that this is very hard. But when I see you in 5 years I will give you a card.” I was 6 years old doing this! What child does this? So as soon as I walked out the front door my parents locked it behind me. I did not know they were in on it, cracking up behind the door. They thought it was amusing. I took a BIG risk right there at 6 years old. I went out into the unknown not sure if I was fully prepared or equipped. I had second thoughts like , hey I have no shoes on I can’t go outside, I don’t even have any money. I can’t do this, I want to go back to my comfort zone, MY ROOM!
After sharing that playful story with everyone I realized the comparison of that moment with life now. In life we are afraid to take creative risks. We afraid of jumping into something or trying something because we don’t know the outcome. We do not know what to expect. We feel as if we are not prepared to face what is out there, so we want to withdraw and go back into our hiding place, our safety zone. But if we don’t take that risk, we will never know what will happen. We will never know what is lying out there inside of us. If I would have proceeded with running away, what would have happened? I still wonder till this day. Would I have been kidnapped? Will my parents have went after me? Will I have been discovered my an talent agent and become a child star? It’s always the “what ifs” that linger in your mind. I think we have the wisdom now to practice good judgement calls when it comes to taking risks. We know when not to, but then we know WHEN TO , but we withdraw out of fear. You do not know what opportunities you pass up by not taking creative risks.If you feel passionate about something, I say give it a shot. If it does not work out then it does not, at least you did it and tried. Life is all about risks, do you have the courage inside of you to actually take these risks? Reflect on it and ask yourself. You never know what could happen.

A new project

Performance Project

So I have been working with University Settlement making 5 years October 24th 2011 and I have had the pleasure in working with Alison Fleminger who is the Program Curator and Educator at THE PERFORMANCE PROJECT at University Settlement. She is simply amazing. She attending my women’s focus group “Revolution Ladies Night” every Tuesday Night along side with the infamous Imani Sublime from

• http://www.penhittingpaper.com/
• http://www.sublimeair.tumblr.com

Please check out her site as well. It was an environment set forth to create a nurturing environment for women to come and creatively express themselves as well as discuss real life issues. It was an amazing experience.

Over the next two months I/we will have the opportunity, resources and support needed to more fully bring out the artist within me/them. And in June God-willing we will be putting on a performance. I am excited. I love to do Improv/theater. It is so much fun.

You can check out The Performance Project here

https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Performance-Project-University-Settlement/188287800627

Tumblr/Blogger

I am going to continue both. It seems to be blogging is dying out now, which sucks.
I also blog on my tumblr where you can follow me there as well http://www.mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/

UPDATE

SO I HAVE WENT FROM BLOGGER TO TUMBLR. I LOVE TUMBLR I AM ADDICTED NOW THAT I HAVE FIGURED OUT HOW TO USE IT. FOLLOW ME THERE
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/
http://mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/

RETIRING FROM BLOGGER && MOVING.....

TO TUMBLR
http://www.mydarlingcyn.tumblr.com/

START TO FOLLOW :)

ARSINEY x CHASER

TRUTH.

ARSINEY x ELEGANT HOODNESS

So Tonight my Friend who is a hip hop artist EdotA performed at Pyramid Club in downtown Manhattan. A.D The General of ElegantHoodness was the host. I saw alot of great talent. Arsiney is one of the ones who really stood out to me. I was really feeling his music, his style, his lyrics, his swag....etc. I am not a huge fan of HIP HOP but he I can definately listen to and have playing on my iPOD. Check Out his songs.
Follow him via twitter @Arsiney and check out his site here

http://arsiney.bandcamp.com/album/the-trailer

PROJECT CUPID x 21-7 MAGAZINE

The short story that I submitted and wrote myself.

Everyone has their own love story. I always sat and wondered when will mine ever unfold. At the young age of 16, I came across somene who to me seemed to be Prince Charming but really was a douchebag wrapped up in aluminum foil. Oh how he swept me off my feet, so I thought. Little did I know the chaos that would take place causing rippled effects in my life. Everything seemed great at first. But then I saw him for who he really was. A monster, the devil in disguise. Never have I met an individual so cold hearted and full of malice. I endured 5 years of abuse. Abuse in all aspects. Mentally, Physically, Emotionally and Spiritually. I lost myself, I lost my friends and worst of all I lost my faith. Something I promised I would always hold on to. And yet I allowed this guy to come and take it from me. I began to distance myself from the world. I hated everything and everyone, couples I saw that were happier only caused me to become more resentful and bitter. Typical scorned woman right? Right. After 5 years I finally gathered up the courage, it was the final blow, literally final blow because he hit me in the face pretty darn hard. I left and never looked back. It took me 4 years of being single to finally find ME again. To find closure and comfort. I gained my treasures back and found some new ones along the way. I always say things happen for a reason and I often use one of my favorite words. Kismet. This was all meant to be. Even if it took for me to get hurt so badly to find where I needed to be in life. And at this moment in time , this is where I need to be. After much prayer and faith, I finally met someone. Someone who treats me like a QUEEN. Someone who listens to me, someone who is not just a lover but a friend. I know that things will not be perfect but I know what it takes. I know what I want in life. He pushes me to do better, to be better, to smile more. And when I feel like I am slipping he is right there to give me a pep talk. All of his kind words has taking some getting used to because of course my first thought and reaction were " This Dude is Bullshitting me right now". But I built up a wall to keep love out and he just broke those walls down. I can't say that we are madly in love, not yet at least. But it is getting there. Everyday is a step by step progress, every day we learn more and more about one another. And one thing I do know is this, although I did find a wonderful man even if things did not work out we will remain great friends and most importantly I found love...I learned to fall in love with the woman in me, the woman my parents raised right and the woman God created me to be. I finally started to love me.


-Cynthia


Check out http://www.21-7Magazine.com/
And if you want to submit your story Follow the rules on The picture Above and send it to
project@21-7magazine.com with CUPID in the subject.

KID SISTER MIXTAPE x KISS KISS KISS

Check it out, sign up for your Free Download

http://www.foolsgoldrecs.com/kidsister/

BRITNEY SPEARS x HOLD IT AGAINST ME

J.Lo always Glows.

                                                                  $2,500 Herve Leger 
Oh a girl can dream, can't she? One day.....one day I tell you, I will indulge in all the amazing fashions trends this world has to offer. Known and unknown designers and just bask in essence of the fabric. 

Smokey Purple Look By SEPHORA

Love Happens.

Eloise & Bruce; both characters made me adore this movie. Eloise was sort of a woman scorned, she has been hurt so when a man gets close she conjures up these negative results and outcomes in her mind leading her to believe that it won't work. Bruce a grief counselor who helps everyone over come their loss but has yet to deal with the loss of his wife.Two individuals who have suffered pain and heart ache cross pathes , both are afraid but both eventually fall in love to give this thing called 'LOVE' another try. "This too shall pass". This movie spoke to me, it touched me, it made me cry of course. As much as I say I do NOT like romance movies, I am a sucker for a good romance flick. And this by far is one of my many favorites. I truely believe that no one is destined to be alone for the rest of their lives. I used to walk around with that mentality. But it is true when they tell you , not to look for love because it will find its way to you. And guess what......CUPID FINALLY STRUCK ME.

I have met the most amazing man. My prayers have finally been answered. I won't say we are in love [yet] but we really really I mean REALLY like each other a lot. We really care for one another. It is so bizarre how we both feel so comfortable around each other. Like we have been great friends for years. I feel like I can be myself around him, with no fear of being judged. That is an amazing feeling. He has changed my perspective on life, on men, on a lot of things. And I look forward to our friendship/relationship blossoming. He makes me feel wanted, he makes me feel appreciated, he makes me feel like what I have to say matters, he makes me feel....bubbly lol. 

For the first time in years I spent the holidays with someone special. Christmas and New Years. I ended 2010 Happy and started of 2011 Happy. God thank you for your blessings. Help me be a better daughter in Christ , help me to resist temptation, help to stand firm in your word.

So I took pictures of course, ENJOY :)

P.S He met my family (they really like him) and he also came to church with (that is a huge deal to me). And he enjoyed the service *gasp* I will be keeping HIM <3 in my prayers. 

"GOD BLESS THE BROKEN ROAD THAT LED ME STRAIGHT TO YOU"

Sincerely,

NEW YEARS 2011 LOOK

Don't Stop.

New feelings erupt from the pit of my stomach
Yet absorbing every ounce of it , it feels oh so familiar
Like once upon a time I was there
At that very moment, meeting once before
Maybe in a past life perhaps
Or maybe even in my dreams
As you held my hand, our fingers locked instantly
The missing piece to a complex puzzle I have been trying to figure out for so long
Kismet
This moment was destiny
You and me, me and you lost in the twinkling stars in your eyes
Safe in your embrace as you hold on dear
This moment in time, as I breath you in
I wish it would stop , so that I can savor every second
Afraid that I will wake up from this wonderous dream
To only be faced with reality
But if this is a dream, then I ask God to let me dream for all eternity.
-Cynthia Lee.

This just speaks for itself, how I feel. When there are no words to say music speaks for me. People believe they understand me when they don't so I just get made fun of or called names. And the world wonders why people lash out. Because of inconsiderate individuals who belong on their own self absorbed planet.